Dunkin’ Donuts Is Rolling Out a ‘Royal Munchkin’

Celebrate the birth of some other country’s future figurehead with donut holes.

Courtesy of Dunkin' Donuts

Courtesy of Dunkin’ Donuts

When Boston patriots like John Adams and John Hancock risked execution to declare their independence from Britain’s tyrant king, they probably closed their eyes and envisioned a world in which Massachusetts could be free from the yoke of the British crown—free, perhaps, to enjoy certain unalienable rights, that among them would be life, liberty and the right to celebrate the heir to a now politically meaningless British throne by inhaling sprinkled donut holes produced by a Bay State-based coffee conglomerate.

Those Boston patriots envisioned correctly, because Dunkin’ Donuts did indeed roll out the “Royal Munchkin” to celebrate the birth of William and Kate’s royal baby, Joffrey Windsor an as-yet-to-be-named heir to the throne. Freedom! Tastes like trans fat! According to a press release, the “Royal Munchkin” is …

… an old-fashioned Munchkin donut hole treat gently dipped in pink, blue and white sprinkles representing traditional new baby colors. The Royal Munchkin will be available in a variety of quantities, including 25-count or 50-count boxes, for a limited time this week at participating Dunkin’ Donuts restaurants nationwide.

In other words, a royal munchkin is just a normal munchkin but with fun sprinkles, a news peg, and a name that suggests you’re actually noshing on a famous British infant.