Meet the Preschool Squad

Say hello to the parents you’ll be spending the next few years with, whether you like it or not.

Don’t miss the rest of our 2018 schools feature: The Ultimate Guide to Boston Preschools.

Illustration by Joe Darrow

The Pinterest Mom 

Comes out around the school holidays, especially Valentine’s Day, Halloween, and St. Patrick’s Day. Spends days (months?) painstakingly sewing over-the-top costumes, crafting Papyrus-worthy cards, and generally making you look like an uninspired parent. Can you say mompetition?

The Naturalist

If it’s not organic, it might as well be poison (so don’t even think about offering Bella a snack on the playground). Put daughter on a gluten-free diet before she was potty-trained; gasps at any mention of the Golden Arches.

Illustration by Joe Darrow

The Overachiever

Claims Sophia could say six words in two languages at nine months old. Has child’s entire life planned out, including future schools and extracurricular activities. Chooses other parent friends based on their impressive careers and perceived ability to write a preschool recommendation.

The Nervous Nelly

Wept more than little Hunter when saying goodbye on the first day of preschool, then sat through the first class anyway. Asks for caregivers’ names, résumés, and Social Security numbers before setting up a play date.

Illustration by Joe Darrow

The Slacker

Missed every preschool application deadline, and always forgets when it’s her turn to carpool. Easily confused by group texts; sends birthday invitations two days before the party.