Why Are These Items of Clothing Called ‘Boston?’

Someone please explain.

A photo posted by @melissamalamut on

Now we are just encouraging people. Yes, please wear your Uggs to walk the Freedom Trail. #worstdressed

The above is a bus stop ad from 2013 encouraging people to wear their Ugg-like boots to walk around Boston. So it’s not that hard to see why Boston was named the worst dressed city in America by GQ in 2011. We beat out cities like the highly-fashionable Raleigh, North Carolina, and Wasilla, Alaska. The article called our fair city, “America’s Bad-Taste Storm Sewer,” where “all the worst fashion ideas from across the country flow there, stagnate, and putrefy.” Those are some fightin’ words, GQ.

Has our style improved since 2011? Perhaps. But designers continue to name items of clothing after Boston, and most of the time, it’s mind-boggling as to why. So we went searching for some of the most perplexing cases.

To be included in this list there was strict criteria: nothing sports related (too easy); no company names (Boston Trader, Boston Proper); no schools/universities; no tourist gear or sweatshirts that say “Boston” on it; no marathon gear or special editions; and nothing with a picture of a Boston Terrier (thanks Forever 21!). Also, we left out a unique instance where all of a sudden Boston became its own color called, “Boston Blue.”

Below, nine items of clothing called Boston for no apparent reason:

1. The “Boston” Gown by Stone Cold Fox


Found on Pinterest

Kendall Jenner was spotted in this dress in L.A. In Boston, on our wind tunnel streets, it doubles as a parachute.


2. The O’Neill “Boston” Sweater


Found on Pinterest

Maybe on a chilly summer night on the Cape. But it should definitely be called the “Vineyard” sweater or the “Revere Beach.”


3. The “Boston” Sweater Dress


Found on Pinterest

Because nothing says Boston like an ugly sweater dress.


4. The Birkenstock “Boston” Clog


Found on Pinterest

In Birkenstock’s defense, the company seems to name every shoe after a city, but suede clogs do not say “Boston.” You need a tougher shoe for our mean (read: wet, snowy, slushy) streets.


5. The Kensie “Boston” Flatform Sandal 


Found on Pinterest

At least flatforms work on brick and cobblestone streets and sidewalks.


6. The Hispanitas “Boston” Ankle Boot


Found on Pinterest

Why are you called Boston?


7. The “Boston” Black Dress Set


Found on alight.com


Why this particular dress is called the Boston we’ll just never know.


8. The Tommy Hilfiger “Signature Boston” Striped Sweater


Found at macys.com


Why? Do we like horizontal stripes?


9. The “Boston” Trench Coat by L.K. Bennett


Found on Pinterest

This is the most Boston of them all. A classic trench, available in powder blue and a khaki color called “Brown Pebble.” Also, what makes it so Boston? The $500 price tag, of course.