Brokehack Mountain

My memory may be on the fritz, but didn’t Howie Carr write this exact same column like a week ago? Only in this case, he’s taken a throw-away line from a throw-away column and stretched that into some manner of mega-throw-away column. Stick the standard Chappaquiddick joke on the top, as he does, and you’ve got a hack sundae.

Today: “So now Sen. Larry Craig is refusing to resign just because he pleaded guilty in a mens room gay-sex undercover sting. Who does this Idaho Republican think he is, a Massachusetts Democrat?”

Last week: “Once again, we see how different Massachusetts is from Idaho and maybe 40 other states, red and blue alike, in what used to be called fly-over country … In [Craig’s] own private Idaho, he’s toast. Around here, he’d be taking a victory lap – er, bow. The Globe would be saluting his ‘courage.’ He’d be ‘turning his life around.’ Barney Frank would feel his pain.”

(Real quick: how is a victory lap gayer than a victory bow?)

Today: “What’s next? An endorsement from the Brokeback Mountain Ranchers Association?”

Last week: “But there are lessons here, even for those of us who do not frequent what Matt Drudge called Brokeback Bathroom.”

Har. Carr’s right that Craig would have gotten different treatment if he was a Massachusetts Democrat, but it’s probably worth noting that if he was, he likely wouldn’t be so vehemently anti-gay, and therefore his restroom shenanigans wouldn’t have been quite so loathsome to people on the right and the left. But then, a concession like that would prevent Carr from achieving dazzling comedic flights such as this one:

“It’s certainly understandable why the Republicans would want Craig gone. What’s perplexing is why the Democrats aren’t welcoming him with open arms.”