Red Sox Players are a Demanding Bunch

Our friends have already started complaining about the World Series celebration being held tomorrow at noon. Because they are gainfully employed, they’ll be forced to sit in meetings as the conquering heroes of 2007 roll down the streets of Boston in Duck Boats. Our natural reaction is to blame poor city planning, but the only people to blame for the weekday rally are the players themselves.

A bleary-eyed Tom Menino greeted reporters this afternoon to review the logistics of tomorrow’s midday rally.

“After long discussions with the Boston Red Sox,” Menino said, “The players have requested the rolling rally be held at noontime tomorrow, starting at Fenway Park and ending at New Chardon and Cambridge Street.”

The mayor went on to detail tomorrow’s celebration. Jumbotrons will be set up at the Boston Common, Copley Square, and City Hall Plaza for easy viewing. The Dropkick Murphys will play, and Jonathan Papelbon made a special request.

“Papelbon will do his dance along the route in several different locations. He promised the people he would do the dance, and he will do the dance,” Menino said in the tone mothers reserve for children who nag them incessantly. So get ready to hear “Shipping Up to Boston” ad nauseum.

Papelbon wasn’t the only player making “requests.” The players asked that this year’s rally not take a spin through the Charles River. The mayor also said the Red Sox players want to have the parade so quickly so they can go home to their families and that the city “respects their request.” But he was clearly not thrilled with having to speedily plan a rally that much of the city can’t attend.

“It’s more convenient on the weekends. Especially for the kids. The toughest part of this is having it during the daytime when the kids are in school. That’s the toughest part for me.”

It’s tough for us too, Mayor. We’d like to think our team loves us enough to hang around for a few days so kids and those with unforgiving bosses could enjoy the festivities. We’ll just have to hope the Patriots are a little less demanding.