T-Shirts Aren’t the Only Thing Being Sold in Phoenix This Week

1201553593If you’re anything like us, you’re already preparing for the Super Bowl. Now is the time to stock up on Doritos before the stores have only Zesty Taco flavor left. You might also want to load up on a variety of beer, and don’t forget book your favorite hookers now.

Don’t look at us like that. If you haven’t arranged to keep your favorite concubine in town, chances are she’s on her way to Phoenix.

In what is easily the strangest Super Bowl story we’ve read yet, WBZ details the huge number of pimps and hookers that descend on the host city.

Every year before the Super Bowl, Tammie Miller would gather her chinchilla coat and hop in a limo with her pimp. The host city, wherever it was, always offered a better supply of men than the lonesome highway in Long Beach, Calif., where she usually worked.

These women are known as “circuit girls.” They travel to cities with big events, like conventions or sporting events, and offer their services to wealthy men. Law enforcement officials from former host cities say the women can be harder to spot than your average prostitute.

“A lot of times they’re very attractive. They dress well, where typically your street walker is in blue jeans, flannel shirt, rough looking. Those are the ones we’re picking up time and time again.”

Flannel shirts? Does every hooker model herself after Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman?

This is why we only need one week between the playoffs and the Super Bowl. We know the players need a rest, but if the culture stories are already this bad we fear to see what Friday will bring.