Townie Town Hall

1218050365The interns at Boston Daily read the community papers so you don’t have to. Then they blog for us. Hilarity ensues.

It’s a Steal

A group of three local thugs allegedly beat a Cambridge man and stole his necklace on Thursday night, according to the Cambridge Chronicle. Police swarmed the area and stopped the three suspects as they ran down the train tracks behind Jefferson Park. They then found the victim’s broken white gold chain hanging around one of the suspect’s necks and seized it as evidence. First rule of being a jewel thief: Don’t wear your loot, especially not right after you’ve stolen it. Second rule of being a jewel thief: Try not to break your loot in the process of stealing it. Makes the resale value drop pretty quickly. Just sayin’.

Shaws: The Center of the News Universe

The Allston-Brighton TAB reports that a Shaw’s grocery store on Western Avenue in Brighton reopened as a Star Market on August 1. The remodeled store now features more self-checkout lanes and larger floral and organic food sections to go along with the company’s new “fresh and healthy” motto. We’re not sure what the old Star Market motto was, but we’re betting on “disorganized and dingy”… Meanwhile, at a Shaw’s on Everett Street in Brighton, a woman was arrested for allegedly carrying 42 DVDs out of the store without paying. The contents of her stash are anyone’s guess, but we’re guessing it included the old classics To Catch a Thief, The Market of Vain Desire, and our favorite, Grocery Mishap, described on IMDB as “Kill Bill meets Aunt Jemima.”

Who Turned on That Darn Bat Signal?

Forget West Nile mosquitoes – Brookline is experiencing a bat infestation. The Brookline TAB reports that there were seven calls to the police department about bats in the homes of Brookline residents this week. To trap a bat, the Department of Public Health suggests waiting for the it to land on the ground, then use thick leather gloves to cover it with a coffee can and sliding cardboard under the container to trap the bat inside. Oh, sure, DPH. When it whips out its utility belt and sends Chris O’Donnell after me, what then?

Medford Wants to Go Green

According to The Medford Transcript, a neighborhood group in Medford has submitted a petition urging the Executive Office of Transportation to place a Green Line station at Route 16 in Somerville, if and when the subway line is extended. At a meeting of the Green Line Extension Project Advisory Group, members of the group detailed a number of reasons why the station would be better off at Route 16 than the other official alternative at College and Boston avenues. Wait a second, good people of Medford. You think a Green Line train will get you to work in downtown Boston faster? You’d be better off purchasing a fleet of giant sea turtles and riding them down the Mystic River, Finding Nemo-style.

Menounos Gains Access

The Medford Transcript (which is killing it this week) reports that Access Hollywood diva Maria Menounos was in her hometown on Tuesday filming an episode of the show, and was given the key to the city by star-struck mayor Michael McGlynn. The mayor told the paper that Menounos accepted his offer to be the mistress of ceremonies this winter when Medford tries to break its own Guinness Book world record for the most people caroling “Jingle Bells” simultaneously. Now if she could get the Obamas to sing “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer,” we’d be interested.


Image of Star Market by Ed Wozniak, Allston-Brighton TAB