Why Doesn’t Anyone Want to Crawl Into Big Papi’s Bed?

The only person Bostonians love more than Mayor Tom Menino is David Ortiz. Big Papi’s bat carried us to championships in 2004 and 2007, and his mega-watt grin brings us almost as much joy as the two World Series trophies.

So, when we heard Ortiz was putting his bed up for auction, we assumed the bids would come in fast and furious. But the slugger’s bed hasn’t received one bid.

Sure, the economy is in bad shape. But we can do better than this.

In April, Mendon car dealer Kevin Meehan dropped $175,100 on an Ortiz jersey that was buried in Yankee Stadium. Yes, Meehan owns the item that shifted the curse talk from the Fens to the Bronx, but Ortiz never wore that shirt. It belonged to a mischievous construction worker, not the Dominican ballplayer.

David Ortiz actually slept in this king-sized bed. Maybe he got a good night’s sleep in it before his walk-off home run in Game 4 the 2004 ALCS. You can look at the autographed headboard and remember that if Papi could bring the Sox back from the brink of elimination in 2004, you can certainly nail that presentation that’s giving you insomnia. Wash that new-found confidence down with some Kevin Youkilis SlumpBuster, and you’re ready to face the day.

But it’s not all about you. Proceeds from the auction benefit the Boston Health Care for the Homeless Program’s “League of Our Own Campaign,” which is raising $42 million in capital to build the organization a new home in the South End.

Come on, Red Sox fans. Redecorate your bedroom, get a new lease on life, and help the homeless by bidding on Papi’s bed.

Boston Healthcare for the Homeless is accepting bids for David Ortiz’s bed until 1 p.m. on September 30. Go to bhchp.org for more details.

Photo from Boston Healthcare for the Homeless auction listing