Six Things That Irk Cambridge's Coffee Gurus

There are some things, like the New York Times Vows column, which beg to be dissected and over-analyzed in order to fully appreciate the way they contribute to the anthropological makeup of our culture. This article in the Cambridge Day, which is about a gathering of coffee shop owners and aficionados in a coffee shop to discuss coffee shops, serves a similar purpose. Here’s a quick survey of all of the cliches brewing Cambridge coffee conflicts these coffee buffs debate in the piece, which you can mull over during your next cup of coffee.

Using a coffee shop to do work on your laptop is a despicable offense. The coffee buffs “expressed a degree of horror at some cafes’ laptop culture.” The horror!

Keurig machines are evil. Those little single-use plastic K-cups, which Dunkin’ Donuts has been proudly touting for the past few months aren’t recyclable. Never mind the fact that when you’re brewing coffee at home, that means you’re not buying it in a coffee shop and supporting independent businesses, so you’re obviously evil to begin with.

Clover machines are so over. “A couple of years ago you had to have a Clover machine, now no one wants one,” said Gus Racantore, of Toscanini’s.

Japanese equipment is totally trendy. But now that you know, it’s significantly less so. “You can only know it was a fad when it’s over,” said BU professor Corky White. Sorry to break it to you.

Fear that Cambridge isn’t as coffee friendly as it could — and should — be. “Cambridge should be a hotbed,” said Jaime Van Schyndel, of Barismo and dwelltime, although he worried there would be a rush of coffee shops opening, even next to other shops. “I’m concerned on this side of river we’re dragging our feet.”

Coffee shops opening next to other coffee shops would not be awesome. See above.

But really, coffee unites us all. “We pride ourselves on being a place where kids with tattoos and grandmas come — where people who don’t normally interact do,” said Josh Gerber, of 1369 Coffee Shop.

Unless, of course, the grandmas or tattooed kids have laptops.