A Platonic Dialogue on Gabriel Gomez’s Plumbing Woes

His plumber sued him in 2007 for unpaid toilet repair work. The matter was settled out of court.


Toilet repair photo via Shutterstock

Today, Buzzfeed published the explosive news that Senate Candidate Gabriel Gomez’s plumber sued him in 2007 for unpaid toilet repairs but settled the matter out of court. The story prompted this dialogue between two Boston staffers:

Eric: Quick what are some jokes we can make about Gabriel Gomez’s plumber suing him in 2007 for unpaid toilet repairs?

Jason: My brain is too clogged for jokes right now.

Eric: [Chuckles.]

Jason: Really? I thought you’d poo-poo that one.

Eric: [Drum set sound. More chuckles.]

Jason: If urine need of toilet humor, I aim to pee-lease.

Eric: [Chuckles begin fading.]

Jason: No but seriously, this is a little bit of a shitshow.

Eric: Is this his Toilet Water-gate? His White-Toilet-water? His … what’s a pun on Iran Contra?

Jason: I’m going to have to think on that one.

Eric: His poll numbers are plunging!

According to Buzzfeed, a representative of Lundy Plumbing couldn’t remember the case and suggested that Gomez probably sent in his check before the case came to court. The poll numbers out today do show him performing less well than last week, though.

[Note: This conversation has been slightly edited to make Eric look quicker on his feet. Jason’s comments were made in real time.]