Wanted: Red Sox Pitcher

Image via Associated Press
Red Sox lefty pitcher Jon Lester is departing from Fenway Park along with Jonny Gomes, which means there’s a job opening on the team’s lineup, and it could be yours.
OK, not really. But that’s the gist of a quirky Craigslist post that takes a knock at the news that Lester will no longer be taking the mound in a Sox uniform.
With Lester gone after being with the team for two World Series Championships—he was traded hours before the non-waiver deadline to the Oakland Athletics, along with outfielder Gomes, in exchange for Yoenis Cespedes—someone was quick to hop onto Craigslist and post a “wanted “ ad for a new left-handed ace pitcher to add to the roster.
Have you ever played baseball? Are you left-handed? Can you occasionally throw a strike? If so, have we got a gig for you! We recently traded away all of our starting pitchers and we need YOU to help us finish the season. NO BIG LEAGUE EXPERIENCE NECESSARY! All you need is a glove, a hat, and an arm. We provide the fielders, you throw the ball!* If interested, please stop by Fenway Park sometime before tonight’s game and ask for Larry. We’ll do the rest!
*No offensive support included.
All jokes aside, however, Big Papi put it best in saying what everyone is really thinking about the trade:
Wishing my man Jon Lester all the best, Red Sox Nation and the Large Father will miss you! pic.twitter.com/7uWpXw8XnH
— David Ortiz (@davidortiz) July 31, 2014
Now start working on that cover letter.