Swiss Newspaper Thinks John Kerry Is Super Dreamy

A 'weapon of mass seduction,' they called him.

Photo via AP

John Kerry with a James Dean daydream look in his eye. / Photo via Associated Press

John Kerry is irresistible, you guys. His handsome suits, bevy of thick hair, and Beacon Hill townhouse that he so boldly avoided shoveling are enough to send people into a warranted frenzy. John Kerry is basically a teen heartthrob. Well, at least for people in Switzerland.

While Kerry and his counterparts from other countries are in Lausanne negotiating the Iran deal, Swiss newspaper 24 Heures called Kerry a “weapon of mass seduction” on the front page of their Tuesday paper, as discovered by Buzzfeed. Sexy!

The publication observed that he was a natural charmer for travelers and was also actively interacting with locals. He visited a particular pub on the reg, and worked the crowds like a potential McDreamy contender. “I think this man needs and wants to mingle with people,” a waitress told 24 Heures, according to Buzzfeed. He also took selfies with his fans. Yes, fans. People who are genuine admirers of our fair Secretary.

See here, when Kerry groupies were spotted at the Musée Olympique as the diplomat strolled the grounds:

This particular group, actually, consists of young American men, the Buzzfeed reporter says, one of which cried, “I voted for you in ’04!”

Of course, Kerry has been romancing with Europe for quite some time. In his 2004 presidential campaign, he was ridiculed for just “looking French,” and receiving titles from conservative media like “Monsieur Kerry” and “Jean Chéri.” In 2013, when his ‘Europhilia‘ resurfaced during his first trip as Secretary of State, he happily demonstrated his language skills, and Le Monde referred to him as a “great Francophile.”

Je suis tres content d’etre ici,” Kerry gushed while in Paris, “I’m delighted to be here.”