Bill Belichick Press Conferences Have Been Phenomenal This Season
Bill Belichick’s five Super Bowl rings are the biggest part of his legacy, but his surliness with the press is a close second. His apparent disdain for the media is palpable whenever he walks up to the podium, and it often manifests itself in grumbles and mumbling mantras that are solely meant to deflect questions in a matter of seconds.
But that doesn’t mean Belichick press conferences are always dull and tedious affairs. In fact, sometimes he’s at his best when he’s shooting down reporters. And once in a while, he actually opens up. There have been plenty of both moments this season. The most recent Belichick highlight was his rant against sports analytics Wednesday, in which he lambasted the movement at length. “I don’t know. That’s really not a big thing with me,” Belichick said. “I’m sure you can go to the Northeastern analytics conference or whatever it is here in summer or the spring and get your fill of it. I’m sure there’s a lot there.”
Belichick, who holds an economics degree from Wesleyan University, is surely aware that the “Northeastern analytics conference or whatever it is” is actually the MIT Sloan Sports Analytics Conference and it’s held long before the summer solstice. In fact, given his propensity to go for it on fourth-down and acquire a bounty of draft picks each spring—both hallmarks of the football analytics movement—he’s quite beloved among the eggheads. But for whatever reason, Belichick didn’t feel like discussing the subject Wednesday. So he struck a disingenuous tone, as he usually does when he wants to dismiss something. When the topic turns to football history or intricate football strategy, though, Belichick can seemingly talk for hours. That was the case last week, when he explained the differences between football, basketball, hockey, and lacrosse in minute detail the day before the Winter Classic.
If verboseness is a defining trait of Belichick’s when he wants to be insightful, then brevity is his go-to comedic strategy. Belichick has quite the dry sense of humor. Exhibit A: His denouncement of hard candy:
Channeling his inner-George Costanza:
“SnapFace” and “InstaFace” (This one is getting a little played out, however):
But of course, there’s no replacing Belichick’s signature brusqueness: Smacking down questions about the Patriots’ curious joint statement with Rob Gronkowski:
The death stare that will turn you to stone:
Though there have been several highlights this season, the best Belichick press conference quip ever remains his impromptu My Cousin Vinny reference at the start of the Deflategate scandal last year. It will be tough to top that: