Ask a Wedding Expert: How Should I Announce My Engagement on Social Media?

Jodi Smith, president and owner of Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting, gives insight into how to graciously share the big news on and offline.


Welcome to Ask a Wedding Expert, a series where local pros answer your most pressing wedding-planning questions. Have one of your own? Email rkashdan@bostonmagazine.com.

engagement announcements

Photo via iStock.com/belchonock

Elaborate engagement announcements have become commonplace on social media, whether that means posting a picture of the shiny new ring on your well-manicured hand or getting your French bulldog to pose with an adorable sign for Instagram. If you’re looking to prevent hurt feelings and prying questions, though, it’s wise to take a moment to consider how and when to politely share the news. Luckily, Jodi Smith, president and owner of Marblehead-based Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting, has a thing or two to say about the topic (spoiler: she doesn’t love ring selfies). Read on for her advice.

The Question:

How should I announce my engagement on social media?

Smith’s Answer:

Congratulations, you are engaged! Such wonderful news that, of course, you’re excited to share.  While your initial impulse may be to post immediately on social media, announcing your betrothal is not the same as sharing photos of your meal at a trendy restaurant. There are people in your life who need to hear the big news directly from you. Your parents, grandparents, siblings, best friends, and closest confidants need to know first. Telling them in person is best for celebratory hugs, but video or phone calls will do, too. Once your innermost circle is in the know, you can start to share on social media.

Online, it’s best to start small with the amount of information you share. Simply posting the big news and a picture of the two of you should suffice to launch a chorus of well wishes. Yes, a picture of the two of you first: Your initial engagement post should be about the relationship, not the ring. Save the epic tale of the proposal and a ring viewing for when you meet up with people IRL.

Even if you have been planning your wedding since you were six years old, it’s best to keep details under wraps for now. People will start to ask about the big day and whether they are invited, so it’s wiser to stay mum until your plans and guest list are finalized.  A simple “We are enjoying basking in the glow of our engagement for now” will help keep the conversation moving along.

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