Let He Without a Gross Office Cast the First Stone

It’s renovation time at the State House. This time around it isn’t Gov. Deval Patrick’s office that’s undergoing a redesign. Former drape-hater Sal DiMasi told the media that his office needs an update in an attempt to control the spin.

He spells it out in the unwieldy title of the press release he issued to wave the white flag.

The speaker issued a preemptive press release yesterday entitled “House Speaker Begins First Renovation in 20 Years, DiMasi Committee Paying for Majority of Costs.”

The subtitle “Please Don’t Give DiMasi a Metric Ton of Crap About This” probably didn’t fit on the letterhead.

But these are no $17,000 drapes. DiMasi maintains his office is genuinely disgusting.

. . . [T]he speaker’s office yesterday submitted evidence of the carpet’s poor condition, e-mailing reporters four photographs of the shabby beige floor covering he has suffered with for several years. . . . “These renovations are long overdue,” DiMasi said in the statement. “After these improvements, I and future Speakers can host the Governor, Senate President, foreign dignitaries, fellow lawmakers, and the public in offices that better reflect the historic building we occupy and the responsibilities given to us.”. . .

Asked whether any visitors have ever complained about DiMasi’s shoddy digs, [spokesman David] Guarino said, “It’s safe to say people constantly remark to the speaker and staff about the state of the carpet in the three offices and the furnishings in the office.”

What kind of guest whines about a carpet to their host? Our mothers taught us that if we don’t have anything nice to say about the decor, we shouldn’t say anything at all. Clearly, we didn’t listen very well, but the point remains. Pointing out the nastiness of a host’s home is rude.

Of course, Patrick is thrilled to see the $13,000 pricetag attached to the Speaker’s name.

“Now I get it,” said Kyle Sullivan, a spokesman for the governor. “Rugs good, drapes bad.”

Only if the carpet and drapes don’t match, dear Kyle.