Natty Heisman

He’s cool under pressure, calm in the pocket and has a Brady-smooth delivery. This, TV commentators and sportswriters have been telling us all year, is why BC’s legit Heisman Trophy candidate Matt Ryan has earned the nickname “Matty Ice.” Week after week, the scribes and TV men — today being no exception with the Eagles’ big win last night — gleefully refer to the star QB as such, without a hint of irony. Which makes us think they probably never went to college. Or maybe they’re just too old to remember it.

Anyone who’s spent four years educating themselves should be well acquainted with Anheuser Busch’s Natural Ice beer, better known as Natty Ice (sounds a lot like “Matty Ice,” huh?). It’s cheep, swillable, extra-alcoholic, cheap, and that’s about all you can say about it. In sum, it will have you trying to recite the alphabet backwards faster and cheaper than any other beer in the land.

This, of course, has made it ubiquitous on college campuses nationwide, BC being no exception. Waiting for the T in Cleveland Circle one day at the end of August, I noticed a giant truck pull up to a liquor store and unload case after case after case of Natty Ice (and its close cousin Natty Light). Forget the U-Hauls crammed under the Storrow Drive overpass, this was the surest sign the students had returned. You don’t think Ryan’s friends had this in mind when they brainstormed the “Matty Ice” nickname?

Or maybe it’s just because he’s super cool.

I’m going to put my head down now.