Weekend Redux: What You Missed

Just because you spent all weekend celebrating 17-0 doesn’t mean the world stopped moving. We round up the notable stories you missed.

1200320234 Things aren’t looking so great in Michigan for our buddy Mitt Romney. When the campaign stops in the state you hope to win are described as “anemic,” we can’t help but get a little pessimistic.

The Romney campaign isn’t the only organization that’s trying to remain relevant in the 2008 election. MTV has harvested 51 journalistic neophytes to cover the election for the troubled network. Maybe if Romney had appeared on Made, he could have been transformed into a viable Republican candidate.

Much like the methadone addiction that threatens many Massachusetts residents, Gov. Deval Patrick is hooked on campaigning. He’s on his way to South Carolina next weekend to assure black voters that Barack Obama can win the nomination. To avoid comparisons to former governor Romney, Patrick is campaigning only on the weekends. That’s how it starts, governor.

We’d have thought the Boston Police Department would tell their officers in firearm training that they’re not allowed to hold up gas stations with their department-issued weapons. Apparently not.

1200320243 At this rate, Tom Brady will never have to pay for anything ever again. Drinks, meals, houses—they’re all on us when you’re 17-0.

The one group who isn’t getting treated by us at the bar is the Turnpike Authority, which has allowed 237 “serious” leaks to develop in the Big Dig tunnels after Bechtel/Parsons Brinckerhoff stopped doing maintenance on the tunnels in 2006. But don’t worry—it would take 25 years of unchecked leaks for the structure to fall apart.

By then we’ll be in our fifties, and will probably be happy to drown in the tunnels rather than have our lives turned over to a guardian in our golden years. It sounds absolutely terrifying.

Dawn Cromwell dares not leave her building. If she tried, a device girding her ankle would sound an alarm. For over a year, she has had to use store-bought reading glasses because her pleas for a prescription pair have gone for naught. She is given medications, but, she says, no one will tell her what they are.

Gov. Patrick will propose that state workers contribute up to 25 percent of their healthcare premiums to save $51 million for the coffers. Good luck with that.

People rode the subway without pants and nobody developed any weird rashes. So far.